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Understanding Stress and Gratitude: Lessons from My Career Journey

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Chapter 1: Stress and Its Origins

Have you ever observed that some individuals seem to handle stress better than others? Have you questioned the sources of your own anxiety? As someone who still grapples with stress and overwhelm in retirement, I sought to understand these feelings.

After dedicating 42 years to a career in retail banking, which I mostly found rewarding, I retired in 2019. Yet, there were moments of intense stress that led to physical symptoms, like an eye twitch. Thankfully, I never reached burnout, but I came alarmingly close. I often found myself catching up on work over weekends, spending my last day off sifting through emails, and routinely starting my workday as early as 4 a.m. I wonder if my status as a high performer stemmed from my skills or simply the long hours I committed.

Now, in retirement, you'd think stress would be a thing of the past, yet it persists. I find myself feeling overwhelmed by personal goals I've set, despite the absence of external judgment. It seems irrational to still experience stress in this phase of life.

Upon reflecting, I stumbled upon a fascinating insight: maternal stress can influence a fetus. A study from the University of Edinburgh revealed that high cortisol levels in pregnant mothers correlate with emotional challenges in their children later in life.

My personal history adds weight to this theory. My mother experienced significant trauma with the loss of a child shortly before my birth. Additionally, my father’s naval service meant he was absent during my early days. This context leads me to consider whether my predisposition to stress can be traced back to my mother's experiences.

My mother struggled with anxiety and likely post-natal depression. This revelation aligns with the findings from the University of Edinburgh, suggesting a genetic or environmental link to stress susceptibility.

The Nature of Stress

Stress is a natural response we all encounter. It arises when we feel threatened or overwhelmed. Known as the 'fight or flight' response, stress releases adrenaline, allowing us to react quickly to danger. However, when the immediate threat passes, cortisol should help restore calm.

Yet, continuous stress keeps cortisol levels elevated, leading to a state of chronic alertness, akin to a never-ending fire alarm in our bodies.

Chapter 2: The Role of Gratitude

Research indicates that gratitude can serve as a natural antidote to stress. Emily Fletcher, founder of Ziva Meditation, refers to gratitude as a 'natural antidepressant.' By focusing on what we appreciate, we trigger the release of dopamine and serotonin, which elevate our mood.

During a challenging period years ago, I was prescribed antidepressants, but I found that natural practices like journaling and meditation were more beneficial. Recently, I've begun to incorporate gratitude into my daily life, and I suspect it could have been advantageous during my depressive episodes.

How Gratitude Can Alleviate Stress

Studies by psychologists Dr. Robert A. Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough demonstrate that individuals who practice gratitude report greater happiness. Participants in their study who focused on gratitude showed noticeable improvements in their outlook on life over ten weeks.

When stress activates our body's fight or flight response, cortisol floods our system. In contrast, gratitude releases feel-good neurotransmitters. Since it's challenging to feel stressed and grateful simultaneously, cultivating gratitude can effectively counteract stress.

Implementing a Gratitude Practice

Practicing gratitude doesn't have to be complicated. Here are a few suggestions:

  • List what you are grateful for each morning or night.
  • Acknowledge the contributions of others, no matter how small.
  • Incorporate gratitude into your meditation or mindfulness routines.
  • Appreciate the beauty of nature during walks.
  • Celebrate daily 'wins' by writing them down.

For the past eight weeks, I've been more intentional about recognizing the positive aspects of my life. Simple joys, like observing my garden or spending time with family, have become focal points of gratitude. I've started documenting three things I'm thankful for each day, and I've noticed a significant reduction in feelings of overwhelm and stress. My sleep quality has improved, and I feel more vibrant.

The Impact of Gratitude on Mothers

Healthcare professionals should encourage expectant and new mothers to cultivate gratitude. Mindfulness apps for pregnant women often include gratitude exercises, providing tools to navigate the challenges of motherhood.

Conclusion: Rewiring Our Perception

Humans are instinctively inclined to identify threats, a trait that has evolved for survival. This predisposition can make it easier to focus on negatives rather than positives. However, consciously seeking gratitude can train our brains to recognize and celebrate the positives in our lives.

While I don't view gratitude as a cure-all, it has the power to illuminate our experiences. Expressing gratitude not only uplifts us but also spreads happiness to others.

I wish I had understood the significance of stress and gratitude during my working years. If you find yourself overwhelmed, I hope these reflections offer some clarity and comfort.

The first video titled "The Science of Gratitude & How to Build a Gratitude Practice" explores the benefits of gratitude on mental well-being and offers practical tips for developing a gratitude practice.

The second video, "Finding Gratitude in Times of Stress," delves into how gratitude can serve as a powerful tool for managing stress and enhancing overall emotional health.

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