The Yes-Man Saga

Imagine a person who can’t refuse a request, no matter how trivial. That was me. I was like those spam emails that promise an exciting opportunity, only to find myself overwhelmed.

“Could you stay late tonight?” — “Absolutely!”

“Can you help me move this weekend?” — “I’d love to!”

“Can you look after my pet tarantula?” — “Yikes, but sure!”

It was draining, yet I wore my “nice guy” badge with pride.

The Moment of Realization

One fateful day, as I agreed to organize a retirement party for a colleague I hardly knew, the truth struck me: Why was I doing all this? Did I even enjoy it? Spoiler alert: I did not.

It felt like that shocking twist in a thriller when you discover the real horror is within your own life—my schedule was a disaster filled with everyone else's priorities.

Discovering the Power of “No”

That’s when I decided to embrace the power of saying “No.” This revelation was like unlocking a hidden talent.

“Could you come in on Saturday?” — “No, I have plans.” (Those plans consisted of cozying up on my couch with Netflix.)

“Can you help me with my taxes?” — “Nope, math isn’t my strong suit.” (Unless we’re counting how many episodes I can binge in one sitting.)

The shock on people's faces was priceless. Yet, the world continued to spin. My friendships remained intact, and surprisingly, life improved.

Finding Balance in Kindness

Let me clarify—I didn’t morph into a cruel ogre. Instead, I learned to set boundaries. I could still lend a hand, but only on my terms.

I became the person willing to assist, but only if we could enjoy some music and pizza while doing it. I would stay late at work, but only for worthwhile projects, not because someone else mismanaged their time.

Living My Best Life

Now, I’m enjoying life more fully. Requests still come my way, but I approach them thoughtfully rather than reflexively agreeing. This newfound freedom has allowed me to indulge in activities I love—like hiking, binge-watching my favorite shows, and even documenting my transformation from a people-pleaser to a self-pleaser (in a wholesome way).

For all the recovering people-pleasers out there, my advice: It’s perfectly fine to say no. Give it a shot—you might just find the time to explore passions you didn’t know you had.

And before you leave…

If you’ve ever struggled with people-pleasing, or if you’ve managed to break free, I’d love to hear your stories. Share your experiences, triumphs, or even your favorite pizza topping (mine’s pepperoni, just saying). Let’s celebrate our journeys with a good laugh and, of course, a slice of pizza.

The first video, "How to Stop Being A People Pleaser and Start Putting Yourself First | Mel Robbins," offers insights on prioritizing your own needs over the expectations of others. Mel Robbins shares practical strategies for overcoming the urge to please everyone and reclaiming your time and energy.

In the second video, "How to Stop Being a People Pleaser and Start Showing Up for Yourself | Mel Robbins," Mel Robbins emphasizes the importance of self-respect and the impact it has on your relationships and personal happiness. She provides actionable steps to help you take charge of your life and well-being.